Last year...

I can't seem to find this dream on my site, so I figure I might as well type out everything I remember about it...

The ship.
This dream took place on a large cargo ship. Not your average run of the mill cargo ship, but a trailerpark trailer on pontoons dragging a boating-dock behind it. The trailer was pretty shabby looking, with cardboard duct-taped to the windows. the front door was perpetually ajar, never to be fixed throughout the course of the boat OR the course of the dream. there was a ladder tied to the side of the trailer to allow access to the roofrack/deck. Call it what you will, they're one in the same in the case of a trailer. The dock was in shambles, tied together poorly using frayed old yellow rope. When I first opened my eyes to the dream world I was standing at the far end of the dock, being pulled behind the trailer.

The tornado.
the sky was a dark blue-black, very ominous and foreboding or so I found. There was a cold wind across the water's surface, cutting through me in the way wind has been known to cut. It was raining sideways and not too far ahead in the distance was a thunderstorm. Not too much farther than that there was a very. very. very. large. tornado.

The legendary pokemon battle.
In the sky above my head, two legendary bird pokemon were battling for the fate of my world. One of them controlled some element of spacetime and the other some element of nature. Things were very majestic and the two pokemon fired beams from their mouths and fire from their wings. Hypnotic mind crushing ripples from their mind's-eye.
This was surely the cause of the storm.

My death.
The only way to save my life was clearly thus: to catch the two legendary pokemon and add them to my collection. To harness their abilities and lay claim to the universe itself. I launched my pokeballs into the sky, go pokeballs! GO! ...
...
...
They merely bounced off the two fighting pokemon.
Their fight paused and they looked at me for a moment. Looked at each other and nodded. I was struck down by lightning and burst into oblivion...

Getting reborn as a giant fish.
When I awoke I was a sailboat on the waters surface. The sky was clear and bright, the wind strong enough to propel me forward, yet gentle enough to not send me astray. I reveled in this perfect moment. I closed my boat eyes and dove beneath the surface. I am I fish, a sailboat size green fish with huge lips... Ready to kiss another fish. It's mating season Missus Greenfish! Pg14 dream sequence, involving fish love of the deck of the titanic.

The alternate ending.
I shake off this dream like the creepy, wrong, foul, disgusting garbage it is and find a better place.

Getting reborn in the basement.
I'm sitting alone in a basement entryway to a house, in the closet. The zombies can't find me here. The zombies can't find me here. The zombies can't... They've found me!
I jump up and push the nearest zombie into the crowd, I smash through the glass door and run out into the field, zombies on my tail. It's nighttime, well lit by a full moon. The yard is a forest, many branch filled trees all around. It must be autumn, because there's no foliage and... and... and I've been bit.

Becoming a super zombie.
I hate this. I have no soul. No life. No ambitions. I will never amount to more than a flesh eating monster. Monster? what do I think I am, zombies aren't monsters. Monsters are cool, monsters can jump forty feet in the air. Pounce on prey and rip them to shreds with incredible predator claws. Shriek with force and instill terror in the hearts of many... I can do these things. And I jump into a tree, cry out, and take down little red riding hood. Bite me.

You know the forks? "I know OF the forks..."

It's night. The moon is shining brightly through the glass ceiling.
I find myself quietly walking on the second floor of the forks market, careful not to be seen. On the main floor there are hundreds of zombies bumping shoulder to shoulder, trying to open up a path for the King Of Vampires. The King is wearing an elegant red outfit, with a cape of sorts. His hair is done up much like Elvis', and he sported a Satan Stache with the little goatee.

Now as I'm sure you know, not every zombie is the same. This was much the case in my dream. The King had some elite zombies that wore make shift armor. Regardless of what the elite zombies looked like, he told them to find me and bring me to him dead or alive.

Now it suddenly became clear to me that my plan was to get to the riverside sewer system underneath the forks market and sneak out onto the river through an emergency exit. It didn't take much planning, the thought just came to me, really. I stumbled upon one of those tiny elevator shafts for meals and mail and I hopped on in! I pulled the rope and off I went. Unfortunately the little elevator was really loud and all the zombies knew where I was. I got to the sewer in around two seconds, because I was falling from the second floor at about 9.8m/s^2. When my elevator stopped I jumped out like a superhero in slow motion -> action pose with a fist in the sky!

I had a pretty powerful area of effect because all the nearby zombies got knocked back in a near perfect circle around me. I started sprinting to the staircase when I heard someone call me out. I turned to find a group of girls standing like... Damn, who's that group... Destiny's Child? NO! Sorry, Charlie's angels, that's the one. Anywho, they said they were still mad at me about being such a heart breaker in high school or something to that effect. To be fair, these were just dream girls. I never went to high school with them and I was never a heart breaker.

A bunch of text slides on up to the center of my dream view, "BATTLE START".
When all of a sudden the girls pull out airsoft guns faster than your uncle pulls it out when your parents leave the room. A grid appears along the floor and the room is broken up into squares and levels... Just like in Final Fantasy Tactics. Except this time there are futuristic robots with arm cannons and shoulder mounted turrets.

I highlight myself and use my move points to run up that magical staircase that I totally mentioned earlier... *Ahem* As you read in the above paragraph, there was a magical staircase in the center of the atrium... In the sewer. This staircase was New-Piano-Key Black, ebony if you were. With a golden rail on one side and silver on the other. Midway up the staircase there was a large break where part of the staircase had collapsed, creating a gap between the lower half and the upper half.

So yes, I started to run up this staircase until I ran out of move points. Then I turned around and used my ACTION POINTS. If you remember, back in the day, we used to have those little rubber domes that you would turn inside out and place on the floor... After a few moments they would pop back to normal and go spiraling through the air? Well it just so happened that my "gun" was one of these domes filled to the brim with airsoft pellets. The group of girls had been following close behind and with one pop they were pelted with pellets. They all suffered serious knockback and were launched into the air in dramatic just-got-pwned poses. They burst out of existence and red text popped into center dream. CRITICAL FLAK DAMAGE.

Encounter resolved.

I jumped to the other half of the staircase and ran to the end...



Where the staircase ends.

The staircase lead to a hammock in the scaffolding of the in-sewer atrium. In this hammock was a hockey bag... Not just any hockey bag but one contaning loads of helmets, skates, miscellaneous hockey equipment, several airsoft guns, and also a sword. A gold and silver sword bent like a hockey stick. It became very clear to me... This was the enchanted armor used by the world's hero ten thousand years ago. I was to wear full goalie garb, and slay the vampire king with this sword.

As soon as I finished gearing up, I found myself in a golden chamber. Meaning this.
The walls were made of golden bricks. The ceiling was supported by golden pillars.
There were several statues of golden women. Lastly, a golden throne.

The vampire king sat upon said throne at the far end, with a smile that went from one corner of his mouth to the other corner of his mouth. That mouth opened and he started laughing. His laughing echoed, getting louder and louder, less like laughter and more like insane white noise. Can you imagine if white noise had an angry, insane inflection? Because that's what this was. From a dull hiss to a scratchy roar the air became painful to my ears. Then it stopped. The vampire king said... Do you see these bricks? Each one of them contains a gem. Concentrated human soul. Refined under high heat and pressure to become nothing but a semi-opaque crystalline rock. These golden gems give one magical abilities...

Your heart is one in the same. A gem. With your disciplined focus heated by your passion for life and love, having undergone the most traumatic experiences one can face. Your heart has been forged into the strongest and most magical gem of all. This is why you can do anything you put your mind to. Designed for greatness. Perfection. Fame. Prepared to burn forever... Your heart is charcoal and I don't want it in my wall.