This dream cannot run on the Wii. It can't handle the graphics

On the night of Friday, December 18, 2009 at 10:05pm, Blues had a dream...

So Dan the Fort people, KT, Wes and I are going to see a concert and get some hotel rooms at the Radisson in Winnipeg. But, get this, we really wanted to go for a walk. So we're walking around back alleys in Winnipeg and here and there downtown when we come across a parking lot that's as slippery as a skating rink. Dan books shit and dives onto his stomach and slides across the lot, Wesley follows suit. Brandon Bisesi says that we are going to get hurt, and Matt pulls up in a 4x4 Truck, hops out, and sidekicks his brother into oblivion. "There's no need to thank me. I'm invincible." And he and his truck disappear.

Dan says that he wants to talk about a problem he's been having. Turns out he's secretly a kleptomaniac and he stole some garbage cans from the Radisson. Not only that but he's stolen many engines and car parts in his days, and he dropped a Hemi into one of the garbages. I tell him the best strategy is to pawn the stuff he steals, and I'll give him $500 for a Trashcan car. So we make a deal, and I take KT for drive. WE PASSED WESTMINISTER! OH SHIT! So we take the big back ally (Portage) and get back onto Stafford. Suddenly the can shoots up into the sky and we're about half the height of the building. Scared, I pull the lever on the side of my chair (just like an office chair) and we zoom back to the ground.

Everyone heads over to Darcey's to celebrate. Everybody gets really messed up before we head out though. After the worlds greatest party and some Smash Bros. Brawl (Which Corey owned at) we all realize that Darcey just came to hotel room, and someone is going to have to clean up this mess.

We all peace out and go to the hotel pool to discover the most awesome thing ever. I CAN FLY. All I have to do is jump into the air and take a huge breath and hold it in. (Sound like Kirby?) So I start flying around everywhere (Though it's the cool kind of flying where I'm standing in a really awesome stance with a hand to guide where I'm going and a hand to look cool) And it turns out breathing in more makes me go higher, and letting air out makes me fall. Some people at the pool start telling me I'm awesome and ask for my phone number and telling me my sin number and my birthname. Oh yeah, and my Gamertag. Turns out it's a group of creepy old men (Who happen to be all my friends, I just took their life-force and turned it into superpowers). So I peace out.

Once I get outside, I find that Winnipeg is in shambles. It must have been Venom.
Yeah, that's what I said. So I start shooting webs at the zombies that are all over the streets (SHUT UP, zombies are cool and these were Venom zombies with symmetrical splotches of black goo on them). I check out some really rad Spiderman Murals advertising his new game that's only on PS3 and 360, but not Wii 'cause it can't handle the graphics. I take a big breath to laugh, and start gliding really quickly towards a brick building. The worlds so called tallest (in Winnipeg...) my strategy is to take a really huge inhale and go over the building, breathe out and land on the roof. Well almost all goes as planned except I pass the clouds, and lose the ability to fly. I REALIZE IT'S A DREAM at this point, and while I'm falling to my death I tell myself it's only a dream and to wake up. It's only a dream. Wake up. Wake up. WAKE UP. And I do :D